Paul Walker‘s mom struggled to go on after his untimely death in 2013.
“I really honestly would wish that I didn’t have to wake up in the morning,” Cheryl Walker said on an episode of “The Dr. Oz Show” airing Thursday. “I would never have taken my life, but I really felt that way, because when you wake up you have to realize that it’s real and you have to re-live all over again.”
Sitting alongside her other son Caleb, she recounted the day of the “Fast and Furious” actor’s death, which included “a really nice conversation with him” in the morning and plans to to decorate a Christmas tree that evening.
She acknowledged feeling guilty knowing she and other family members survived Paul, and said his sudden death at age 40 is something she lives with everyday.
“People think that you should just get over it, but they’ve not experienced this,” she said.
“There are people that have any my heart goes out to all of them.”
In the time since Paul’s passing, the star’s father and 18-year-old daughter sued Porsche for wrongful death, claiming the sports car that he was in when he was killed suffered from numerous design defects. Porsche was later deemed not responsible for the fatal crash.